Today I come to you with the most unfortunate of recipes. A dastardly attempt at something sweet and delicious in the face of tragedy and upset.
The following recipe for coconut cream cake is cumbersome at its core. It is not worth the time and resources you are bound to put into it, but I suppose you’ll find yourself making it anyway in the hope that it will be better than you’re being told. You are mistaken. I assure you of this.
While this recipe should serve as a treat to most, for the Baudelaire children it is only enjoyed in the dreadful reptile room of a distant relative, Uncle Monty, after a series of unfortunate events.
This is a deliciously deplorable coconut cream cake that everyone will hate to love.
- 1 box white cake mix
- 3 eggs
- 1/3 cup vegetable oil
- 1 cup water
- 1/2 tsp coconut extract
- 14 oz cream of coconut
- 14 oz sweetened condensed milk
- 1 cup heavy whipping cream
- 1 tbsp granulated sugar
- 1 cup sweetened coconut flakes
Preheat oven to 350° F. Grease a 12×17 inch baking sheet.
In a medium bowl, combine the sweetened condensed milk and coconut cream until smooth. When cake comes out of oven, poke holes in even rows across the top and carefully pour mixture over warm cake. Refrigerate for several hours or overnight.
Once chilled, use a 3.5 inch round biscuit cutter to create cake layers.
In a stand mixer, whisk heavy whipping cream until it forms stiff peaks. Add sugar and continue whipping until stiff.
Layer the cake and whipped cream (I recommend two layers) and cover completely with whipped cream. Press coconut flakes around outside of the cake. Enjoy.
I am undesirably a member of the Netflix #StreamTeam. This means I am burdened with the task of sharing what they pen as “entertainment” with you each month. I auspiciously await your failure to judge me on such duties. Click here to read more unpleasant posts about Netflix.